Jesus?

last night i had a dream -

it was the day of my wedding
i was set to marry a man i was deeply in love with
but i was deeply troubled by what i was wearing
i wrestled with what i had on for most of the morning
it was all so ugly, i was all so ugly
and i desperately wanted the robes i had seen on others
as the hour of the wedding ceremony approached -
i buckled
i made a dash to a store and purchased more beautiful robes
and at home, so close to the moment i was to be married
i saw that the new robes were ugly and so distorted upon me
that i looked like a man
i could not go to my own wedding
i was overwhelmingly devastated
as the hour of the wedding passed
my 'husband-to-have-been' made a call to me
he was sorrowful that i hadn't shown up to be his bride -
he was sorrowful that i had rejected him at the altar
and my heart broke -
for it wasn't that at all -
i loved this man with all my heart
and i realised i should have just shown up as i was
that was all he asked, that i come and be his
and i woke up

this day - sept 27

this day -

i see out the window
and watch as a cat
climbs the kowhai tree
to catch a tui
but the tui flies off
to another kowhai tree
and continues to sing
and the cat
now at the top of the kowhai tree
looks dumbly around
it even looks at me -
is it embarrassed?
it turns itself around 
and skulks ungracefully 
back down the tree
and walks off...
and the tui flies back to the kowhai tree
and continues to sing
i am to be as the tui