His discipline

we are called to repent.



if you are like me
and believe you have nothing to repent
beyond the repentance you first announced
when you accepted Christ
then you may be wrong -

 

i was wrong.
it doesn't matter what any one else has said
yes, we will live out the circumstances of our sin
that i know is true -
but it is the Lord who calls me
and so it is the Lord
who withdraws from me
and shuts me in
and closes me down
and brings punishment to me



He revealed my pride against Him - in me
a pride so subtly hidden
beneath my desire for justification
my desire for my plans
my desire for my desires
His silence drove me to pursue Him



not seek Him - so meek and mild
not read about Him - so easy and comfortable
not sing about Him - with gay abandon
not lift my arms - not fall on my knees
not tithe my last dollar - not attend every church meeting in town
not beg, plead and borrow to get Him to talk to me -
i did all of that and more

He drove me to Pursue Him - go after Him
harrass Him - persevere and persist on Him
stalk and shadow Him - trace, track and trail Him
scout out and search for Him
find Him, find Him - whatever it took to find Him
and when He finally spoke 
i saw that He had been speaking to me all along



He gave me the chance to humble myself before Him
reveal my repentant heart -
realise I am repentant to none but Him
see myself through His eyes
and bow down in humble repentance
that He has been so merciful to me



the day of the Lord is coming
the day of His Judgement
and in His mercy He is calling on His people
those He has chosen and called out to be His own
He is calling us back - through our heart breaks
through our broken down walls and unfulfilled dreams
through our misery and our drowsiness with this world
through our sorrows and our losses
through our broken hearts and empty cupboards
He wants us Hungry for Him 
for He want us with Him

oh so blessed to be loved that much - amen